An Update On the Giant Chicken

Okay, so, my Duckies, it turns out that the giant chicken, whom I have lovingly named Jay-Z (it only makes sense since Jenny Lawson's Chicken is named Beyonce), is..... wait for it..... not for sale. :( giantchicken

The lady who owned the chicken at this thrift shop, however, did inform me that she acquired Jay-Z from a man about 5 hours away. And that she payed almost $400 for him... IF ONLY I HAD $400 DOLLARS!!!!

So then I got thinking... If I were to launch a kickstarter in order to acquire Jay-Z, would you donate? My thought is that he can live in my backyard and keep birds from flying into my window... not to mention, he can totally be supportive when I'm sad... or he'd be awesome to take Christmas photos with... I could even try to put him on wheels and have Gio pull us around town. The possibilities are endless, people.

Who's with me??