If someone steals this idea, I will be pissed. Or honored. I'm not sure which.

A text exchange I recently had with my boyfriend during my lunch break: Me: So this is a weird thing: I keep feeling slightly sick... But only at work...

Boyfriend: Well that is an interesting mystery.

Me: Right? My throat starts to get all sore and stuff.

Boyfriend: Wait, wasn’t there a problem with the heater? Did that get fixed?

Me: Yeah, it's working now.

Boyfriend: Well I wonder if that has anything to do with the air quality of the shop since it is effecting your throat.

Boyfriend: affecting?

Boyfriend: stupid grammar…

Boyfriend:  poutemoji apparently this is the pouting face according to Apple… I disagree.

Me: That is a face of fury. Who pouts like that?

Boyfriend: I know! Silly Apple...

Me: We should write them a strongly worded letter.

Me: Using only emojis.

Me: And then we'll see if they can decipher it correctly.

Me: And when they don't, we'll just be like poutemoji

Boyfriend: I like this plan.

Me: And then we can fork their lawn.

Boyfriend: We are going to need a lot of forks for Apple’s lawn, but that would be epicly amazing.

Me: Wouldn't it?!? We could wear all black and do it in the middle of the night!

Me: I think it would be fun to break into major places like that and shut down their security systems all Ocean's 11-like just for the sake of doing weird pranks.

Me: Can we be that couple?

Boyfriend: Of course we can!

Boyfriend: But we should wear mock turtlenecks and blue jeans as a sign of respect to Steve Jobs.

Me: This is why I like you.