I'm Being Productive in My Real Life Today, Which Means I'm Being Lazy on the Internet.

Today I am copping out of writing a post and instead doing a throw-back to the old days because I've decided that not cleaning my apartment for one more day might actually be illegal. So, in the spirit of productivity, here is an old post from way back when:

Please Stop Hitting On My Dog - It's Getting Awkward for Everyone Involved.

I grew up owning the national dog of Surburbia, the Golden Retriever. In fact, my parents have two now, bringing our Golden Retriever total to three so far.

So a lot of my dog knowledge had to be adjusted when I got Gio, a pure-bread Siberian Husky. I quickly learned that his temperament was vastly different from my other dogs, but I've gotten used to that. There was one thing that I was totally not prepared for though: the gawking.

I get it people: my dog is freaking beautiful. At first. I mean, he's still pretty, but once you stare at him for a while you start to see that his eyes kind of look in two different directions... But most people don't see that right away. They see this:

This is not Gio. This is some super regal looking Husky.

This is weird, because Gio actually looks like this:


However, because people somehow manage to see the former version of a Husky when they look at Gio, I am constantly hearing many different forms of "Oh my goooosh!!! What a beautiful dog!!!"

When it first started happening, I wasn't sure how to respond. "Um.. thank you?" That seemed weird, because I am certainly not responsible for his looks... and a "Yeah, I know" seemed weirdly cocky... Nevertheless, I just went with the "thank you" because what else do you say? If you say "really?" people assume you clearly don't love him enough, so that was out the window, and then you get weird looks.

I also didn't really realize how much this was going to happen. Today for example, I had three people literally yell it to me from across the street. "OH MY GOSH YOU'RE DOG IS GORGEOUS!!!" "HEY! PRETTY DOG!!!" "WOW, A HUSKY! HE'S BEAUTIFUL! LOOK HONEY, A HUSKY!!"


One woman even stopped her car and then drove by us really slowly while she stared at Gio. I kid you not when I say that he stared right back.

What if people started talking like that to each other... "Oh my gosh, you have beautiful eyes!" "Thank you, kind stranger that I was casually walking by!" I mean, I guess that does happen, but only with construction workers and creeps in cars that honk at you...

I'm also a little worried that all of this is going to go to Gio's head... I mean, he already tries to get away with some pretty weird stuff - like, we're battling over a hole that he keeps trying to dig in the garden right now. Pretty soon, I'm worried that I'm going to come out there and he'll be all "Yeah, but look how pretty I am, Mom!" and I'll be like "I KNOW BETTER, YOU CAN'T LOOK THE SAME WAY WITH BOTH EYES, YOU WEIRDO!" and then my landlords will wonder how good of an idea it was to let me move in to the apartment attached to their house.

All I'm saying is that I think it's weird that people feel the need to shout at me or my dog. If you did that to any other being, like a child perhaps, people would have you arrested.

Besides, you're really starting to fuel his ego with your construction worker-like behavior.