Super cute and then SUPER NOT CUTE.

Okay, so first of all, if you follow me on any social media channel, you know that the cutest thing in the world happened and her name is Aloy (yes, like Horizon Zero Dawn) and JUST LOOK AT HER.  

Yeah. I know. She's just the best. She's three months old and we adopted her on Monday night and so far things are going well. A lot of you have been asking how Gio is adjusting and he's just being the best big brother. For example:

But, to be honest, I have other news to share, which I did not expect to be the case. I was all "Friday's blog post is just going to be the cutest ever," and then the least adorable thing that could have possibly happened, well, happened:

 

 

So.... that.... ugh, let me just start at the beginning.

Yesterday we discovered a snake skin in our living room.

A freaking snake skin was sitting between our air purifier and the wall, right near the radiator. You know, WHERE THERE SHOULD NEVER BE A SNAKE SKIN.

And this means that not only was there a snake in my living room at some point, but it was alive. And growing. Because, as I realized via googling "WHAT DO I DO WHEN I FIND A SNAKE SKIN IN MY LIVING ROOM," the only reason a snake sheds its skin is that the skin is officially too small for the snake's body.

There are about 19 different things about all of this that I find alarming.

The good news (if I have to pick some good news out of this?) is that we're fairly confident that due to the scale pattern on the tail, this is the shed skin of a non-venomous snake... so I suppose that's comforting. Then again, we're not exactly experts and this little bit of information doesn't get rid of the fact that a snake was sneaking through our living room in recent history.

The Mr. is being disturbingly calm about this whole situation, by the way. Like... he found the snake skin while I was at work, left it there, and then randomly that evening he just casually told me to go look behind the air purifier. Then he went back to whatever he was doing while I curled up into a ball of panic for the rest of the evening, just waiting to start hearing voices in the walls, telling me to "kill.... kill..."

Perhaps I should count my blessings, though, because I was just thinking to myself that nothing strange ever happens to me anymore.

Thanks, Universe. You always come through.


In other news, the very first (and only public) episode of Sunday Supdates is going up this weekend and I am so excited about it, so make sure you come back here Sunday night to watch! If you have no idea what I'm talking about, click here.


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Humphrey.

So I was sitting in my living room, drinking my coffee and reading the paper the other morning when all of a sudden I heard a big BANG and a CRASH above my head. Humphrey was rearranging.

Humphrey is my mysterious upstairs tenant. I don't know what he is, but he lives in my attic and I have never seen him. He is definitely bigger than a mouse, but smaller than The Hulk.

Every now and again I hear him doing things up there and I think "I should go up there and investigate to figure out what he is," but then I open my attic door and I start going up the stairs and suddenly everything gets very quiet  and all these images of a rabid opossum lunging at my face start going through my head so I turn around and go back downstairs, leaving Humphrey to live in peace. Let's be honest here, people: Is there anything creepier than an opossum's face coming at you from the dark?

I've decided that Humphrey is one of the following:

  1. A squirrel. He definitely runs around a lot and when he knocked over whatever he knocked over the other day, he ran laps around the attic for about half an hour in a panic. Also, I live out in the woods, so squirrels are in good supply around here. It's the most logical answer if you're into that sort of thing. He could also be a raccoon. Both of these options are adorable.
  2. A boggart. Humphrey never sounds like he's just one size. Some days he sounds little, and on those days, Humphrey tends to hang out in the walls. Other days I can hear each individual footstep as he walks around the space above my bedroom. Either way, I'm sort of pissed that I still don't have a wand because when it comes to boggarts, you really need a wand. Add this to list of reasons I need to go to Harry Potter World.
  3. The Weasley Family Ghoul's Cousin. Obviously I'm not silly enough to think that The Weasley Family Ghoul moved from the Burrow to come live in my attic. That would be a ridiculous assumption. Maybe he has a cousin who did, though, right? I mean, this would make sense. Just like the Weasleys, I don't think of Humphrey as a pest, but more as a pet at this point. I call up to him when he's being to loud, or when things fall over, I shout "Are you okay, Humphrey?" and then he moves around a bit as if to be like "Yeah, I'm good, thanks!" Humphrey and I have excellent communication skills.

Whatever Humphrey may be, I have come to love him and the idea of him leaving my house feels very sad. Also, I'm sort of too terrified of him to try and kick him out. See photo above.

Get ready. This is a Nerd Style Giveaway.

So, it's no secret that I'm a bit of a nerd. My staircase is decorated like a game of Space Invaders and I have Undesirable #1 Wanted posters from Harry Potter hanging up in my living room. My books are stacked everywhere and my TARDIS blanket keeps me warm during my Netflix marathons. And I wear this nerdiness with extreme pride. I don't leave it at home for people to discover, should they ever come over. In fact, I take it to the work place. I usually walk around with my TARDIS to-go coffee mug and sporting my Gryffindor scarf in the cold weather. (When I was a kid, I wore The One Ring on a chain around my neck because I obviously was just passing through class on my way to Mordor.) All the while, though, I try and keep my nerdiness trendy and stylish so that if you didn't know what the reference was, it wouldn't be distracting or take away from the professionalism that I also need to maintain in the workplace.

This is why I was really excited when I was approached by JordanDene to do a review and giveaway. This shop creates some of the most gorgeous items to wear that will keep you feeling both stylish and like a true fan throughout your day. They're shirts that you can dress up or down. For example, this is how I wore my Harry Potter shirt to work the other day:

IMG_2549

IMG_2550

 

This shirt is absolutely amazing. The fabric is so soft, and yes, I've washed it a few times now, and it has maintained its shape and feel. I love how it fits because it doesn't make me feel like I'm showcasing my body, but it also doesn't make me feel like I'm hiding anything either, which is the perfect balance, in my humble opinion. Even my super trendy, never nerdy sister approved of this outfit and she basically looks like she's always walking out of a Calvin Klein ad, so... woohoo!

Anyway, enough of my yammering because here is where the fun begins! I GET TO GIVE ONE OF YOU LUCKY FOLKS A FREE SHIRT OF YOUR CHOOSING FROM THE JORDANDENE STORE! (See, this is why it's important that you stick with me).

Normally when I see these giveaways, the giver is asking for you to follow them on every single social media platform in existence. I'm not going to do that because I believe that if you're following me, it's because you want to be, and not because I teased you with free merch.

SO, instead of that, I'm going to ask you to have some fun with this. Send me a photo that shows how you let your Nerd flag fly in the workplace. You can do this using any ONE of your preferred social media platforms (ONLY ONE ENTRY PER PERSON). Just tag me (links to my profiles are at the top of the right sidebar) and use the hashtag #NerdyWorkPlace and I'll pick my favorite to WIN A FREE SHIRT FROM JORDANDENE. If you enter at all, you will get a discount code to use at the Jordan Dene shop, too, so there's really no downside to this.

This is especially fantastic if you have to do any holiday shopping for your friends who are also nerds. Just saying.

This contest ends at 11:59PM EST on December 15th, 2014.

Window? Squirrel Parkour Course? I've Heard It Both Ways.

So, my best friend, who has decided to go by the pseudonym "John Hamm" on this blog (so as to avoid any Internet association with me) texted me this video just now:

Me: Oh my gosh. So cute.

JH: He's growling at me now!

Me: Haha! I love him.

JH: I think I'm gonna turn on the air conditioner and show him what's up.

Me: No! That's so mean!!

JH: I think he tried to attack me through the window... It was kind of adorable, but totally fruitless.

Me: Awww. What a cutie! Name?

JH: Haven't thought of one... But "Snape"* talks to the squirrels like they're outdoor kitty cats, so maybe I should pick one.

Me: I think so... Neville? Or Seamus? Seamus was pretty squirrelly.... and he always caught on fire.

JH: Maybe Gerald. But I think I name everything Gerald.

Me: Ha. Gerald...

JH: Maybe Starbuck. Because it started of cute and then it got really annoying...

Me: YES.

 

*"Snape" is "John Hamm's" boyfriend. He really does look and sort of talk like Snape. It's uncanny and a little disturbing.

I'm Safe Because I'm Not a Mermaid. Thank God.

Being a redhead means one of two things:

  1. You're awkward, kinda chubby, and about 18 different flavors of outcastRon-Weasley
  2. Or you're blessed with every attractive quality possible:amypond

 

Unless you're like me and you have that strawberry-blonde hair color, which makes you  a strange blend of incredibly awkward, but not hideous to look at. It's kind of nice, actually, being the weirdo that I am. It means that guys might hit on me at bars, but then when I start talking about Harry Potter and Doctor Who, they'll leave me alone. It's a wonderful defense mechanism that requires very little effort on my part.

We all know that I've had various awkward conversations in my lifetime. Granted, most of them are my fault, but my hair has become an odd source of these conversations, and since I don't want to dye my hair for various reasons, the comments that I get never seem to end. Here's just a sample of some conversations I've had:

In the salon:

Hairdresser: Is this your natural color?

Me: Yup!

Hairdresser: Oh my gawd, I love it. You don't have any coloring in here at all?

Me: Nope. I've never dyed my hair.

Hairdresser: YESSS!!! VIRGIN HAIR!!!!

And that's when I became very aware of how sacrificial the act of cutting one's hair can be.

 

At church:

Elderly Woman (think Bathilda Bagshot in the last Harry Potter film before the whole snake thing): [getting very close to my face and peering at me suspiciously] Is your hair red or brown?

Me: Um... Red.

Elderly Woman: Brown?

Me: No... It's red.

Elderly Woman: Orange?!

Me: Yeah, I guess it kind of is orange...

Elderly Woman: Hm... How did you obtain that?

Me: Um... birth?

Elderly Woman: Well, I'll be danged!!

And then she just walked away.

Not only did she not believe her own eyes, but she also wasn't completely sure whether or not to trust that I knew what color my own hair was... and then it wasn't even "is that your natural color?" but it was "How did you obtain that?" As if I worked really hard to make my hair the color that it is. I concocted potions and mixed dyes together for years in a bubbling cauldron and then I sold my voice to a ragged witch in exchange for this hair color - OH MY GOD, SHE IS THAT WITCH.  This woman is going to try and steal my hair. Now I'm terrified.

This must be what Ariel went through in The Little Mermaid. Well, back off bitch, because I HAVE LEGS, SO YOU HAVE NOTHING TO BARGAIN WITH!

Apparently I Can Eat A Lot... Including the Dead.

So... I'm a nerd. WHAAAAAT? I know. Shocking, what with all the times that I've told  you to watch Battlestar Galactica and Doctor Who... or made you vote on which Harry Potter phone case I should buy... you never saw this whole nerd thing coming.

But it's true, duckies. Underneath my super trendy exterior... I'm a nerd.

Which is why it's weird that I went to a baseball game yesterday with my other nerd friends.

We found it best to just think of it like a giant board game. It helped.

Okay, so let me explain how we even found ourselves here:

My one friend is moving away this week, and as a going away gift, someone in his office game him four tickets to the game. They weren't just four tickets, though. They were club seats.

So, I knew that this was nice, but I didn't totally grasp how awesome it was until I was getting my wristband from a security guard as she said "Everything except the alcohol is free. Enjoy the game!"

Yeah, that's right, fellow nerds, FREE FOOD AND DRINKS ALL AROUND. We immediately devised a plan: To collectively eat at least $250 worth of food, which in a stadium should not be that difficult, let's be honest.

This is basically how my day went: Nachos. Baseball. Pretzel. Baseball. Pizza. Baseball. Snowcones. Baseball. Peanuts! Baseball. Ice Cream. Baseball. More nachos. More baseball. Rinse and repeat.

It was glorious.

And then we went out for dinner.

Which is why I'm a champion. A very nerdy champion.

After all that, we went home and played actual nerdy board games to reground ourselves. This was especially awesome, because in this particular game I was a Cyber Bunny who earned the title of  the "Even Bigger Canabalistic Urbavore Eater of the Dead," which in my opinion is way cooler than "Pitcher."

Just saying.

Also, go buy and play King of Tokyo. Right now. It's like Yatzee, but with monsters. In Tokyo.

 

And We Have a Winner!!! ... And Some Other Stuff Too!

Yay!! We have a winner, folks!! Option 1

In other news....

I just found this music video by Ed Sheeran and everyone needs to go watch it right now. Why? Because it stars Rupert Grint and everyone needs more of him in their lives. At least you people do, because you love me and I love Rupert, therefore you love Rupert. End of story.

Moving on!

Today, I spent the morning with Jane making felted soap.

 

 

soap

Yeah. She's crafty like that... and I like crafts so sometimes I attempt to be crafty just like her. Most of the time I fail, but today I did pretty okay! So go me!

***

Dragon has the sick today, which is a total bummer, so I'm also going home soon to make some soup for him while I clean the apartment. In other words, my Monday is becoming far more domestic than most of my days. Is this what being a housewife is like? If so, it's kind of fun!!

***

Okay, that's all. Sorry that today's post is so flitty and sporadic... I'll do my best to organize my thoughts tomorrow.

 

Happy Monday to all!

Guys. Guys. Guys... I Need Your Help.

Okay, folks. I got an iPhone 4. Yes, I know I'm behind the times, but I'm also poor, so stop judging me.

The questions is this....

What case do I get? Dragon had bought me all those heavy duty you-can-spike-this-phone-like-a-football-without-hurting-it cases after I shattered the screen on my first iPhone, but those cases only fit the iPhone 3. So....

This is where you come in!

If I promise to be more careful, then I think I can handle something cute. Obviously, my mind went straight to this:

"WHERE CAN I FIND AWESOME HARRY POTTER IPHONE CASES????"

Answer: The Internet. Duh.

So then when I got to the Internet, I was all "HOLY CRAP THERE ARE SO MANY!!!" And that's when I decided to make you guys make the decision for me. Suckas!

So now you get to vote on which iPhone case I'm going to get. Don't worry, I've narrowed it down to just 3.

Choose wisely.... I'm depending on you people to keep me adorably nerdy. I'll tally up the votes on Monday!

Option 1

hpiphonecaseoption2

Option 3

Help me out here, people. You know you want to.

Feel free to send me other ones that you think are better, too!

And hey, what the heck should I read next? Tell me on the Book Reviews page!

Happy Saturday!

The Best Thing I Ever Saw in Colonial Williamsburg

So, I'm still sick, which totally stinks, but last night I went out for beers with John Hamm, Kelloggs, and Gumby. It was then that John Hamm reminded me of the awesomeness that we had experienced a few weeks ago. I cannot believe I ever forgot to write about this story.

So, a few weeks ago, John Hamm and I went to visit Apollo in Virginia for the weekend. Many of you remember my awesome stories from that, I'm sure, but I totally forgot to tell you about the best story ever from that trip.

We decided to go out to Colonial Williamsburg one day. It was right before Sandy hit, so we were just walking around in a basically empty Williamsburg in the rain. That aspect of it was kind of lame.

We did, however, stop for pancakes at the Colonial Pancake House, and the day became totally worth it.

Not only were the pancakes amazing, but I will never forget what I saw that day, but I will forever regret that I didn't whip out my phone and take a picture fast enough.

Sitting in the booth across from us was none other than Benjamin Franklin. Cool, right?

Don't worry. It gets better.

So, he was sitting there alone, reading a book and drinking some coffee. I laughed, thinking, "How cheery!" but didn't really think much else of it.

Until he got up and left and we saw what he was reading.

John Hamm: Holy sh*t. Benjamin Franklin was totally just reading Harry Potter.

Me: MY LIFE HAS BEEN MADE.

And then we all just stared through the window as we saw him walk away, Harry Potter under his arm as he followed a modern day family at kind of an awkwardly close distance...

I always knew that man was a Potter fan...

Alright, now I'm off to watch TV and drink copious amounts of tea in hopes that the devil will stop attacking my face.