I feel like we're doing the whole "romantic sunset" thing wrong.

A conversation I had with The Mr in the car yesterday:  Me: Oooo... pretty sunset. It's so weird to think that it's all just pollution.

The Mr: What are you talking about?

Me: The sunset. The only reason it's all colorful and pretty is because of pollution.

The Mr: No it isn't! It's just the angle of the sun causing all of those colors.

Me: Yeah. The angle of the sun reflecting light through all of the poison in our atmosphere. Did you really not know this? You love science! And the environment!

The Mr: Are you serious? This whole time I've been admiring sunsets and they're really just all made up of poison?

Me: Yes!

The Mr: Well... that's terrible! Now I can't enjoy a sunset anymore!

Me: Why not? It's still pretty! Think of it this way: there's an upside to everything. Even pollution.

The Mr: No. No! That's like saying "Hey, come look at this gorgeous painting, isn't it amazing?" and then finding out that all the paint is just blood splatters from a gruesome murder.

Me: Well... when you put it that way.

We drove in silence for a minute.

Me: You know, the color of the sky kind of looks like a big wash of blood now that you're saying it. Huh. I still think it's pretty.

The Mr: You've ruined everything for me now.

Later on, The Mr did some research and it turns out that I'm not totally right about this fun fact, but I'm also not totally wrong either? I don't know, he started talking all sciencey to me and I zoned out a bit if I'm being honest.

Just goes to show that you can't trust everyone you meet who says they know science.


 

Last night's #SundaySupdates episode was live to all! You can watch it right here and then go sign up to be an Awkward Ambassador to tune in every week!


This blog is able to remain ad-free because of the awesome community of Awkward Ambassadors on Patreon. If you’d like to become an Awkward Ambassador and receive special perks (like exclusive vlogs or messages from my dog), please click here.

Not a real post, but a great reminder!

Hi friends! This isn't a real blog post, but it's just a friendly reminder that the public #SundaySupdates episode for the month is tonight at 8pmEST on the youtube channel! Come and watch me try to cook while also trying to answer your questions - all live! Who knows how many body parts I'll still have by the end!

I do this show every Sunday for the patreon supporters, but the last Sunday of every month, it's open to all! If you're interested in joining in the fun every week, head on over to the patreon page to become an Awkward Ambassador today!

It's a really good time :)

 

Gym Drake is my Unicorn: A Sequel

Okay, so the last time I wrote about the gym, we all learned about my obsession with this guy at our gym who looks exactly like Drake. I was pretty excited to go back to the gym tonight, not because I wanted to get buff or anything (seriously, exercise is VERY boring), but because I haven't been able to capture this guy on camera yet and I feel like I owe it to us all to provide photographic evidence of his existence. And alas, we walked in to find that 1) There were more people than usual for this time of day and 2) NONE of those people were Drake.

To say that I was depressed about this fact might seem dramatic, but let's call a spade a spade. I lazily went through my workout. It became pretty clear that Gym Drake holds the power of my motivation.

So after 30 minutes of just meh-ing around, I went and stood by The Mr. While he did things that looked difficult yet physically rewarding, I hopped onto Instagram Stories:

[video poster="" src="http://awkwardlyaliveandpleasantlypeculiar.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/09/img_9148-1.mp4" id="2321" loop="true" autoplay="false" preload="metadata" width="640" height="360" videopress_guid=""][/video]

BUT THEN HE APPEARED.

Seriously, everyone, just as I hit "send" on that video, Gym Drake came down the staircase that I was standing next to and rounded the corner into my vision NOT TWO FEET FROM MY FACE.

So, naturally, I spun around frantically in small circles before running after him. Subtly.

 

via GIPHY

I needed that photo.

As luck would have it, he ended up going into the weightlifting room, and The Mr had ALSO gone there. Ignoring the fact that I never saw The Mr leave the room we were previously in, I knew that this. Was. My. Moment.

I walked over to The Mr with the expression you see in the above photo still on my face. He looked at me and sighed before nodding to confirm that yes, he had seen who just arrived and then he gave me a look like "I swear to God Emelie if you get us kicked out of this gym, I will divorce you."

Everything was set up so perfectly, though. The mirrors in the room were perfectly positioned so that I could pretend I was taking a picture of The Mr when I was really just getting a photo of Gym Drake in the background.

THIS. WAS. MY. MOMENT.

And then, just as I was raising my phone to make the capture, Gym Drake suddenly got up and quickly left the room.

It took everything in me not to fall to my knees screaming.

 

via GIPHY

And HE NEVER CAME BACK.

I swear to you that he does exist and that I have seen him MANY TIMES. I'm just pretty sure that he can sense when cameras are around and, like a unicorn, he must avoid them before his existence is revealed, because THE WORLD CANNOT HANDLE THE MAGIC.

Or maybe he's a vampire? And if I tried to photograph him, I would find out, and then he'd have to bite me or kill me, so maybe he's really just thinking of me because he wants me to live. Aw, Gym Drake... you're just the best.

 

via GIPHY


In other news, this month's public episode of #SundaySupdate was last night and it might have been the greatest episode yet? Apparently, cracking eggs is my cooking superpower and my knife skills are "frightening," so... I HAVE SUPERPOWERS! I'm pretty sure that's the takeaway here. Anyway, if you missed it, here is the episode. If you're interested in joining us every week, sign up to be an Awkward Ambassador on Patreon! We have tons of fun.

 


This blog is able to remain ad-free because of the awesome community of Awkward Ambassadors on Patreon. If you’d like to become an Awkward Ambassador and receive special perks (like exclusive vlogs or messages from my dog), please click here.

"SCATTER!" -My Brain.

My Bestbian is on her way to visit me from Boston RIGHT NOW and I am beyond excited because I haven't seen her since my wedding day (which was sadly the day I married someone other than her. Damn you, sexuality!)

We have MUCH catching up to do, so forgive me if this post is a little frazzled. Afterall, she now has to get to know me as a married lady and not her awesome, super hot single friend.

Just kidding. I've always been a married lady - I just only got the spouse recently.

Anyway, The Mr is yelling at me without using his words right now because the house needs to be cleaned just a little bit more before Bestbian arrives. I realize that sounds confusing, but it is possible to yell without actually using any sounds from your body. Basically, he's just walking around cleaning, but he's doing it really loudly, and history has taught me that this means "PLEASE GET OFF YOUR BUTT AND HELP ME PREPARE FOR YOUR FRIEND."

Or maybe he's just really passionate about cleaning?

Anyway, I should probably go... but to make up for this very scattered blog post, I'll be doing a live Q&A on Sunday night at 8pmEST for public #SundaySupdates! You should totally join me.

Also, here's a cute picture of my puppy who is definitely not this small anymore and is definitely trying to steal a sip of my vodka tonic as I write this. YOU'RE TOO YOUNG, ALOY.


#SundaySupdates, a live Q&A I do WHILST COOKING, is live and public this Sunday at 8pm! Most Sundays it’s just for the Patreon people, but the last Sunday of every month, I open it up to ALL OF YOU! Can’t make it? Post a question in the comments or on Twitter using the hashtag #SundaySupdates and I’ll answer it during the livestream!


This blog is able to remain ad-free because of the awesome community of Awkward Ambassadors on Patreon. If you’d like to become an Awkward Ambassador and receive special perks (like exclusive vlogs or messages from my dog), please click here.

No episode, but still a #SundaySupdate

Hi! So..... I tried filming the first episode of #SundaySupdates last night and let's just say that things went TERRIBLY. A fire was almost started, I burned myself a whole lot, corn exploded, and hot oil went EVERYWHERE.

On top of that? The video stopped recording so there's not even hilarious content to show you.

BUT I AM NOT GIVING UP. Instead I'm tweaking.

Next week I'm going to try again, but with a small change, possibly two:

  1. I'm making it a Q&A.
  2. I'm thinking of maybe making it a livestream?

This is where you come in! Leave a comment below if you think I should livestream it, and if you have a question, either post it as a comment here or send it to me on Twitter using the hashtag #SundaySupdate.

Oh, and to make up for it, here is a picture of our adorable new puppy just being the cutest: 

See you tomorrow, loves!